When I woke up in the morning, I relaized I was supposed to be at the Million More Movement March with Clay and of course he was out the door handling business like my lazy ass should have been but I was laid up with a cutie pie.
So, the first thing I did after realizing I had fucked up was wake up Left after kissing him for like 5 minutes and then showering so I could drop him off, clean up the living room a lil bit before meeting Clay at the march.
So, we head down Florida avenue and I finally get him to his destination before telling the brotha to go back to NYC and tell his girlfriend that it was over because he was moving on to bigger and better things and that he was moving to Chicago....lol... crazy me- that's probably why the brotha ain't called me since.... so anyway.. I park my car after dropping dude off, and walk a few blocks until I see black folks galore walking in the same direction, so I do what I always do- "When in Rome do as the Romans do"-
So, I'm following my people hearing chants like "1, kness up, 2, chest down, 3, head up, 1, 2, 3,4, kness, chest, head". When I finally got closer to the march, I called Clay to find his 20.. and he tells me he's at Freedom Plaza and to walk towards the White House- I'm like kewl.. and I walk towards the crowd when suddenly as far as I can see I see nothing but black people, and amazingly I started crying- I couldn't believe it, but water filled my eyes and I felt like I was losing my balance- yet and still I continued to walk amongst my people to find my friend.
The more I walked the more emotional the march was for me especially after reaching Clay and getting the low down on what happened. So, supposedly, Minister Farakkan extended his hand out to the black gay community and Keith Boykin was supposed to speak on "our" behalf. However, after arriving at the clearance point that morning, he was told he could not speak, so about 50 or so black gay folks stood together at Freedom Plaza to "unite" and march to the march to demand inclusion.
Well, suprisingly, I found myself marhcing with my fellow brothas to the march. As I watched the g pride flag fly above us, and the chants of black, gay, pround.. I relaized how much of a coward I was as well as how courgaeous I was at that moment. I was stuck between embarrassment, disbelief, confusion, and the need to stand up and be heard but with who, among who, and how? How does one stand up?
As I watched my friend, Clay boastfully walk down the street I saw the glimmer in his step, the pride in his cheeks, the sound of his voice, "black, gay, proud", while I could only muster "black, gay" and as I turned to him I said "Pooquie I don't know how pride I am right now"... at that moment something changed or perhaps things had already changed neither one of us realized it- at that moment we were as the weekend would prove were as we had always been "different"- I was a coward walking along the sides of a warrior and he was well "himself" standing up for something he believed in.
His voice and presence gave me the strength to muster a few "black, gay, and prounds" but mostly I could only be seen, complain, and recite were family and that we are.................
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
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