Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Brothas how true is this?

Igght, I really do have something to blog about, but it won't be this entry..lol..

So, check it out just got done reading this article on msn.com about what men think of as being "romantic", so I wanna ask the brothas who read my blog how true is this or is this article simply related to out heterosexual counterparts..

Cause for me and maybe I'm a lil "sensitive" candlelight dinners turn me the fuck on and sitting by the fireplace listening to a poem gets my blood boiling, the article actually had me wanting to go get a woman... hmmm.. and I've been meeting a few pretty ladies lately, so a brotha might be about to backslide.. anyway, how true is this..

What men consider romantic by Steve Friedman is the author of The Gentleman’s Guide To Life. (taking from msn.com)

Romance rule #1: Don’t expect anything in return
Michelle and I had been dating a little over a month when Valentine’s Day occurred. She’d invited me over to her place, where she was going to cook dinner. I brought some flowers and chocolates, because I’m a guy. When I entered her apartment, I could smell the steak broiling, the apple pie cooling. Very nice. But what was even nicer was her: A low-cut little cocktail dress. High heels. A string of pearls. An apron. (I’m not presumptuous enough to say it was every man’s fantasy, but being mine was good enough.) We kissed, we hugged, we ate. And all was good and romantic, until, just before dessert, Michelle rose from her chair, walked behind me to nibble an ear, then said, “OK, now help me clean up.”

Women, we men folk are all about sharing and caring and doing our part to ensure fair wages and an equitable distribution of housework and whatever else we’re supposed to be all about. But when we think of romance — and we do, we really, really do — we do not think of enforced reciprocity. Just as you want us to buy you things and treat you to dinner and tell you how beautiful you are because we want to, we want you to be affectionate and giving and do the steak and apple-pie cooking because you want to. You don’t want us to say, at the end of a romantic evening, “OK, now help me with the check,” or “I shelled out a lot of cash, sweetie, now it’s your turn to pony up.” Likewise, we don’t want “will you please help clean up” to be part of a deeply romantic gesture. In most guys’ eyes (and hearts and other parts of the anatomy), romance means giving. Not sharing or swapping favors. Giving. We like it when you understand that.

Romance rule #2: Take charge
Men are generally left with some or most of the burden of organizing outings, so the day you turn the tables on him and arrange the whole deal will be close to his heart. My good friend was really struck when his wife threw him a surprise birthday party on the beach, complete with a bar full of tequila and cable TV so he wouldn’t miss any football games and lose track of his fantasy football league. For one friend of mine, having a weekend-long mountain biking trip planned in Big Sur was a highlight—especially because there’s something about the view from a mountaintop, and you with him, that gets a guy feeling very amorous.

Romance rule #3: Add a humorous twist
Men generally don’t go for sappy love notes, but if they’ve got a sense of humor or something else going for them, recognizing that can be very effective. My friend Dan says he still fondly thinks of the girlfriend “who made her own fortune cookie fortunes — not the cookie, just the fortune — and would hide them throughout my apartment, in my wallet, a book I was reading, bedside stand and even luggage. I don’t know how she did it, but she had them printed in red ink, with those little half-cut holes that come on real fortune cookies. She would come up with great quotes and would print the date next to them. Like, ‘Time spent with you multiplies my happiness exponentially.’”

Romance rule #4: Sex should be involved, almost always
Call us simple-minded brutes, but for men, sex and romance are so inextricably linked. Pretty much any effort you make in the bedroom is automatically romantic. Not just fun, but romantic. He’ll feel closer to you—and you to him as a result, which is really what this is all about. If you’re not sure how to jump-start things, know that lingerie will usually do the trick. What you should wear and how to spring it on him depends largely on the guy. As my friend Jack put it, “If you’re 30 and under, a romantic gift to a guy really is (sad to admit) a woman in some clichéd, too-small, black-and-red lingerie outfit. We don’t need dinner,” he says. “If you’re over 30, a romantic gift can sometimes be a ski weekend (or any other activity-oriented getaway). Lingerie is still part of the equation, but not the trashy kind at this stage.”

Romance rule #5: Prove you’ve got him pegged
One man’s dream of the perfectly romantic day might be drinking 40’s of Budweiser together and going to Yankee Stadium for a baseball game. Another might prefer a day of hiking followed by a trip to the hot springs. For another it is going out for brunch and lazing around in the café, drinking coffee and reading the paper. What’s your guy’s favorite activity? Once you figure it out, give it to him. The more I heard from my friends, the more I realized how different we were. Not just from women, from each other. I have never gone for fancy lingerie—it’s always seemed too calculated, too cheesy. And I prefer to read novels and biographies over fortunes, no matter how sweet the intentions of the fortune-teller. Fantasy football? No thanks. All a woman has to do is to show she understands me and is deeply fond of the guy she understands. Then, I’m all hers.

Well, I argree with #4 almost immediately, I tell people all you got to do is feed me, fuck me, and love me and I'm yours... LOL.. It's like my mother says woman marry for love or financial security and men marry for sexual compabitibilty...
Honestly, I'm going to marry who ever I fall head over fucking boots with...lol .. cause a brotha doesn't wear heels.. but at any rate, I guess it's that time of year again, because the blog I need to write is about this lonenliness that I'm feeling and I guess asking my self again "why don't I have anybody".. but I guess I keep tolling myself that maybe i'm supposed to be alone right now.. so right now this loneliness is consuming me..


Anonymous said...

Some of those rules I disagree. It call comes down to how much one guy is willing to do or risk to get or keep the attention of the other person...

E said...

Actually I think I see the point being made in all the rules. But of course, what works for one person may not necessarily work for another.

Thanks for sharing the article.